"really don't know love at all..."

what life feels like right now...

life's been full of... things. amazing, wonderful things - new things, new experiences, new friends, new challenges. the magic of the stage and the beauty of dance, excitement over new possibilities, weeks packed full with amazing and sometimes not-so-amazing times.

after the performance, after the craziness has passed, right now life actually feels like a song :) ever heard the "Glasow Love Theme" from the Love Actually soundtrack? it conjures up feelings to me -

feelings of... seeing life from a large point of view, like an ocean. where events are not simply points, but merge together to form a big picture. where i'm able to look back and see clearly what has really mattered to me throughout this time. it's like a man sitting on a beach feeling the waves lapping at his legs and seeing the sunset beautifully past the horizon, the day after a huge thunderstorm. the being able to look back and smile at what has happened, and yet feeling a reservation, because you know that it's not the things that really matter.

see the man watching the little precious sailboat ride the waves of life as the winds lead it away from the beach - the beach where the man sits with tears in his eyes: tears that can come only when you know that you've found what really matters, and have lost it.

i don't want to be that man