on games and friends and contradictoriness

just writing some stuff on my mind while taking a break from studying :)hmmm i haven't written a poem or story for some time... well maybe another time :)

so I've uninstalled all the games from my laptop because I got sick of killing some random shapes on the screen instead of doing other important stuff - stuff like studying, chatting online with friends... *real life* stuff.

but it got me thinking... i think we guys play games because there is not enough in real life, because a world inside the computer can be more interesting and fun.

real life... what makes real life real to you?

for me, it's the friendships, people, relationships that are so dear. it's interesting... i'm an introvert that likes to live inside my own mind, but i often find myself crying out for a close friend or two. i'm an introvert that doesn't like being alone :) i'm a telephonophobic that loves talking to close friends, i'm afraid of crowds and noises but i want to spend time with people.

yes, it's difficult to balance...

talking about the telephone, yeah i have a slight phobia of it - ask me why another time heh... and it's difficult because i love talking to close friends, and my net connection has been so bad that chatting online can be difficult. i can want to talk to someone badly, but take very very long, or never, to get down to calling the person.

yup, i'm kinda contradictory :)

ever felt like there's so much more you want to write but didn't have the words for it? goodnight...